And what a lovely Sunday it is! Our A/C stopped working yesterday, so it was delightfully toasty in the house. Wonder Dog gave coronaries to some of the golfers playing behind our yard and has actually made the course’s list of hazards. In collaboration with one of the Glibertariat, I’ve started a new company, but I’m worried I’ll fail the drug test (“Not enough.”). My mother has been regaling us with stories of 1940s Baltimore (“…and the colored people had their own schools. They were terrible schools. It was so depressing.”). It’s been an interesting weekend.

Surprisingly , there are birthdays today, starting with the first sign of spring; “I thought you said you wanted a larger pianist!“;  the toilet king; a guy who was buried in his own invention; the inventor of the laser show; one-fourth of the most brilliant comic team since the Three Stooges; one of my childhood fantasies; and someone who visited famine-struck areas and filmed commercials there.

On to the news!

 

Shut the fuck up, Barry. You were every bit as embarrassing and twice as bigoted. Say, how’s your buddy Farrakhan doin’ these days? And your mentor, Jeremiah Wright?

 

Why the Second Amendment really is a racial justice issue.

 

No possible way this is a hoax. No. Possible. Way.

 

Look, kid, I’m from there, too. He’s right about this (though its relevance to a congressman is… nonexistent). Deal with it. Once again, I hate everyone involved. This guy as well.

 

Spud put up a Puddles video last night. Fortunately, this was not Puddles.

 

When you think, “Where on this planet do women have the fewest rights?” there’s only one possible answer.

 

Maureen Dowd can make even the most sensible idea seem stupid. This is a talent.

 

It’s tough to be stupider than her, but here’s a senator who manages to do so.

 

 

And fitting the theme of the Hazard of the Fifteenth Hole, here’s today’s entry in the annals of Old Guy Music.